What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
She announced her abortion via fbk
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
