But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
too bad you live with your parents still
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
