what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
