Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
if only i could text you this smell
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
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