So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Randomize
