She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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