I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
