capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize
