I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
