she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
