Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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