Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Randomize
