ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
