i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
Randomize
