The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
