had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
