You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize