Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
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