oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Shame - the story of my life.
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