i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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