I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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