Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
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