the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize