why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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