Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
worst night to have a conscience
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
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