Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
