I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Randomize
