Have you finally orgasmed yet?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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