Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Randomize
