i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
