Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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