Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
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