her vagine was all disorganized.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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