her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize