To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize