Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry 1234 =] hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(856): View more from New Jersey

i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!

(917): View more from New York City

question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?

Fav 24 2638 781
share tweet
(916): View more from California

How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.

Fav 34 1395 3983
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.

(604): View more from British Columbia

HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES

Fav 26 5542 1761
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(907): View more from Alaska

I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!

Fav 2 910 606
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(936): View more from Texas

I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.

Fav 3 167 271
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT