I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
