I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize