is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
