dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
