Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
