i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
