I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
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