we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
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