I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
Randomize
