He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
