Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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