Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
