Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Everclear isn't food dammit
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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