i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
