Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
So this is completely apropos of nothing, but I have a feeling that a friend of mine might be a good match for you. Can I set you two up on a date? Oh, and it seems that we live a block away from each other and aren't having sexy times. This is ridiculous. By the way, there's a chance that I might be a tad drunk. Still though, there's a very *good* chance that you and Mr. X would get along.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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